Stuff to Know BEFORE

  Buying Romantic Gifts for a Girlfriend

It's tough buying romantic gifts for a girlfriend...even when you know what you're feeling for her is love.  Pity the dude who likes the lady, enjoys her company, wants to continue to be with her but knows what he's feeling isn't the real thing. He's not a bad guy. He wants to do the right thing.  But he's between a rock and a hard place.

There's a huge expectation in our consumer culture that men should buy something romantic for their wives or girlfriends on certain occasions throughout the year. 

Christmas and birthdays are tricky enough. But valentines day can be an assault on a guy's integrity!  The problem is that the passion inherent in the heartfelt symbolism of romance gets in the way of a meaningful expression of affection.

Let's talk about buying romantic gifts for a girlfriend when you're in love.

But are you in love ?  Is she in love with you ?

Big subject, but in essence "in love" means to adore, to be devoted to or to hold as precious.  It's a selfless wishing of well-being for others that doesn't expect a reward in return.  If the shoe fits, wear it.

Why do Men Buy Romantic Gifts?

There are  two reasons:

1.  Because they love her

2.  To stay out of trouble.

But did you notice that I wrote "expects no reward in return"?  

Are you buying a romantic gift for your girlfriend because you love her or because there's an expectation on her part (and yours) that you're supposed to?  Is there a bit of idealistic fantasizing on both sides of the fence?

Here's something else to think about.  Is what you're feeling lust or love? 

Lust, that urgent hunger for sexual gratification, was invented so the species doesn't die out. 

Love was invented so that mummy and daddy put up with one another long enough to provide life's physical and emotional necessities to the baby that lust created.

Have you noticed that couples who've been together twenty, thirty, forty or more  years don't get in a knot about buying romantic gifts for one another?  It isn't that they don't give one another so-called romantic presents now and then...its just that they don't feel the NEED to because that isn't how they express love. 

What's the difference between a romantic gift and a personal gift ?

When you take a close look at your relationship you might realize that you don't really want to buy a romantic gift.  Maybe it makes mores sense to buy a gift that acknowledges your feelings for your girlfriend in a more realistic way.  Keep in mind that a gift is a communication.

This may help:

  • Romantic as a noun means an idealist. 
  • Romantic as an adjective means dreamy, impractical, starry-eyed and idealistic. 
  • Personal means particular, special and intimate.
  • Integrity means truthfulness and honesty.

With those concepts distinguished you'll probably have a better idea what you want your gift to say to your particular lady.  

Coming up!  

Some ideas on what to buy in the area of personal or romantic gifts for your girlfriend.

Links to buying gifts for girlfriends:

Romantic gifts that don't cost money.

Something important to know when buying unique gifts for her.

Buying romantic gifts for a girlfriend when it suddenly gets serious.

Gifts for girlfriends when the relationship is new.

Gifts for your girlfriend when the relationship is warming up.

Girlfriend gift ideas when the relationship is long term.