Buying Gifts for Girlfriends and Feeling Overwhelmed ?

Buying gifts for girlfriends can be a challenge.

You can find yourself wandering from one end of the mall to the other, looking at stuff you can't even name. You can go up and down escalators so many times you'll start to think you should buy a monthly pass . . . and you still won't know what you're looking for! 

But if you get a few things clear in your mind BEFORE you head to the shopping plaza,  you can start to feel like you're in control.  Buying gifts for girlfriends can be something you can learn to handle quickly and confidently. 

It's even possible to enjoy the experience.  Isn't that a strange concept!

So put the car keys away, grab a beer from the fridge, sit down with pen and pencil and put your thinking cap on.

When it comes to buying gifts for girlfriends, you have to remember that bit about a gift being a communication.  It's like delivering a sticky note that reads "Hey, I really like you!" or "I have so much fun when I'm with you!"

The important question you have to ask yourself is, "What's the message I want to send?"

When you get your head around that, everything about gifts for girlfriends will start to fall into place.

But pay attention.

The gift you buy and the message you want it to convey will depend on this . . .

Just where are you in the dating game?

Lets start at the beginning and assume that you're just a few months into this liaison.  If that isn't so, read on anyway because you'll probably benefit from the pointers, but then follow the links for suggestions on how to handle gift buying  when the relationship is medium or long term.

What do you Know About your Lady ?

What is she interested in?

What are he favorite activities?

What makes her laugh?

What makes her sad?

What are her goals?

What else do you know?

If yours is a relatively new relationship or you're a young man just starting to date, you actually have it easier than more experienced contenders.

That's because when you buy a gift all it has to say is something casual like . . . 

"Hey....I like being with you. I notice you're interested in...(fill in the blanks) when I saw this it reminded me of you."

You're probably going to have to pull your thinking cap down over your ears and tie it on tight, because if you were conscious of things like this you wouldn't need my help and could already make a list of ten inexpensive and innocuous gifts that would be perfect to tell her "This reminded me of you."

Did You Notice I Used the Word Inexpensive ?

If your relationship is fresh and new it is NOT the time to buy jewelry, perfume, lingerie or a red Ferrari to match her hair.  It isn't even time for a so-called romantic dinner.

Early in a relationship you just want to buy something light and friendly.  "Love" isn't the operative word in the bond between the two of you at this point.  You like her and find things about her attractive, but that's it.  So you don't want your gift to say what you don't mean. 

This is especially true on Valentine's Day when all the products you'll see promoted have hearts on them...and you know what a heart is supposed to represent! 

Don't go there. 

When a union is in this early stage a gift could be something as simple as

  • a downloaded song or an audio book that you KNOW she will like
  • a small box of chocolates...not heart shaped.
  • a single flower ... preferably not a rose, at least not a red one.
  • a new horn for her bicycle that chirps like a bird or maybe
  • lunch at the Zoo.

Get the idea?  Fun.  Frivolous.  Funny. 

Nothing personal.  An inexpensive present that acknowledges something she's interested in or something that you realize both of you would like to do together would be fine.  That's why you were supposed to write down what her interests are.

When you look back and notice that your relationship has evolved to the point where you (and everybody else) has begun to think of you two as a "couple", then your gift list can be expanded.   Then your search for gifts for girlfriends may start to cost you money.

When You've Just Said Hello

When You're in It for the Long Term

Romantic Gestures

Other Links


Gifts as a Communication

My rant on Romantic Gifts for Girlfriend